Yay! I got the kitchen table!!   Can’t wait until it gets here. Unfortunately it will be a month before it arrives. pedro bought Me yet another bikini today.  Princessfan, I wore that yellow bikini and it’s THE BOMB! Girlfriend loves it on ME and the color looks so good with MY little tan.   I got $500 from fagarina. Always great fun to snatch your cash fagapauper!  $300 from terrance. simon I saw $100 from you..isn’t that quaint?  Send more! 

oliver twisted!!! I know you are watching and wanking!  Now it’s time to whip out $500 AGAIN and cry like a baby!  Oh yeah..it was sooOOOoo amusing when you had a big guilt attack last time and cried your little faggot eyes out!  I laughed SO hard!  I’d like an instant-replay! HA!!

fatmac our toes command you to pay for 2 pedicures IMMEDIATELY!! you will TOE-tally LOVE to pay for it!

Someone told me the Pride Night ticket page wasnt working.  Try this one.

 Oh this order fell through, I still want someone to get this art. you can even use paypal

Oh I have a question for you “handymen”.  I want to replace a recessed medicine cabinet with another recessed medicine cabinet.  What would be the easiest thing to do? Get one a bit bigger and cut the hole larger or try to get one the same exact size?  Is changing out recessed medicine cabinets going to be a big ordeal?

Hey buttchunks!  Start sending Me some amazon gift certificates to use towards that kitchen table on MY amazon wishlist or be a hero and buy the entire thing yourself!  HOWEVER, if you decide to make MY day and buy the entire table yourself, send gift certificates for the entire purchase so I can have the item sent directly to MY house..otherwise it will go to MY UPS store and then I will have to pay more to have it forwarded to MY home via freight which will cost a mint.

There are some other things which are high priority items on MY amazon wishlist. Get to them!  I’m surprised one of you didn’t hop on the opportunity to buy the stun guns! hahaha  Here’s a list of the amazon items I want asap.

the dining table
the fragrance air diffuser
floating lounge chairs
the stunguns
the lumbar pillow and spine alignment device
the matrix curl products
the flush light fixture
The other Ed Hardy watch

One of you with a foot fetish can get all the Opi toe nail polish I posted.  Run little piggies, to My amazon wishlist!

One more framed artwork for the guestroom

the ukraine sent $400, $200 amazon GC from the new uk slave, $200 from pedro and $300 from some new guy from boston, fatty sent $75 of chipotle GC’s for MY girlfriend’s lunches and Princess fan bought that business suit .   fagarina did you put that $300 cash in the mail???  oh stupid ben sent $200 GC for some man’s suit store.  I obviously have no use for it, but I sold it for $175.  If family and friends send you gift cards that I can’t use, I expect you to still always fork them over to ME because I can always hock them online for less than they are worth. hahahaha!   Oh to whoever bought ME that rolling laptop station. I am sending it back.it was such garbage.

Somebody buy Me 2 tickets for Pride Night.  We are going to stay over night in a hotel so I will be booking that and expecting you fucks to pay for it. 
Have them shipped to:  Sierra Horizons 1933 E Dublin Granville  Rd, Columbus OH 43229

Summer is keeping Me super busy. Run run run!

NOTE:  Ben, I found someone who will buy that graduation gift card of yours.  Email Me asap so I can get the # again.

  Look what I woke up to in MY mailbox!! 

Yep, $1,500 from old guy george!!!! Hopefully My merchant account won’t give ME any problems because it’s such a big transaction. $1,000 is MY maximum transaction. Hopefully, they won’t notice and will let it slide. When you guys are doing big tributes it’s usually safer to break them down into multiple smaller transactions like $500. Anyway, WOOOOOO FUCKING HOOOOOOO MOTHAFUCKAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Always a pleasure taking your cash, georgie!

Here’s Me showing off My new Ed Hardy watch. Sweeeet. I love it!  Added a few gift shots to My slideshow. The watch, Ed Hardy shoes for MY girlfriend, new table lamp, bird feeder, decorative tray, an orchid, some makeup and hairstuff. There are tons of other things I need to photograph. I’ll try to get to it in the next few days.

I’m having the worse period of MY life. I had cramps for 48 hours straight. you may all insert your tampons in your stinky mangynas.fuck, stuff 2 in there.and leave the applicators in!! Feel the pain, bitches!!

Here’s Me looking all gorgeous as usual.

 Another funny poem by the Queen of Diamond’s Unroyal Fool. hahaha!

I adore female shoes, I adore female feet,
But instead I kiss balls, suck fuggly guy’s meat.
I want to be a man, but I’m really a mouse.
I open my mouth when there’s dick in the house.
I live to please Princess and Veronica the Great;
And swallowing cocks is always my fate
I long for a girlfriend but it will never be.
There’s no happy ending for a loser like me.
They have made me a freak, and happy to serve.
What other use for a cocksucking perv?
So all of you bitches send cash and prezzies too,
Thank Princess for keeping you in her animal zoo.
Just open your wallet and let Princess rape.
And then lick the dick of some hideous ape.
I am a cash cow and happily say ‘moo’;
And I pray every night to Veronica’s shoe.
So roll up roll up and give them your all;
Know that they’ll laugh, spend up, have a ball.
You DO want to pay these women so royal;
They deserve all your effort, your money, your toil.
For they are the Queens of Diamonds and Hearts,
They bash us with clubs and put spades in our hearts.
This poem now ends with a satisfied smile,
As the Queens take your cash and they do it in style.

Oh for those of you who love seeing ME in business attire, buy ME this from Victorias Secret. Email Me for size and color and shipping address. fulfilled by Princess fan

Here are your shopping orders, bitches!!  There are even a few cheaper items for you po’ folk.   Get to it, whores!

Extra Wide Medicine Cabinet  get with stainless inside and the mounting kit $360

Crateandbarrel.com
Get one large bowl and one small bowl.
Green Vase 
Kitchen Towels Get 2 sets
Olive Oil in Cute Bottle

Pottery Barn
4 outdoor pillows in orange fullfilled by terrance
This list will be growing throughout the day.  Right now I’m looking for a 45 inch wide bathroom mirror and 2 new medicine cabinets.

Who just bought ME the blowdryer??

Update again:  zippy slave just got $99 framed art and a $120 bikini.  Can I just say “Rocks to be Me! Sucks to be him!” HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Update: zippy slave just sent another $500 cash!!  So his cash total alone is now $2,400.

burt’s nickname is zippy slave.  OMG we had a blast tonight!!!  First he started out by sending $400 which I reported down below.  Then he did another $400.  Then $300. Then another $800!   So that’s like what $1900 cash?  Then he went to MY amazon list and got another pair of Ed Hardy sunglasses,  the laundry etagere, the rolling laptop desk, 2 bottles of MY $26 mascara, that $200 latex dress I posted sometime back which none of you morons bought yet (assholes).  Then to top all that off, 2 bathroom vanity lights totalling $400!!

Hey burt! I got your $400. Didn’t I use to have a nickname for you?  I think I forgot it. Email ME and remind Me what it was.  oh .. how about you send another $300! Admit it! It will be fun.   Then I got $175 from this strange sissyboy who liked to giggle super stupid and talk about “powdering his nose” with cocaine.  Major borefest.

Yo assholes. When you comment, log into your account and upload a userpic. It’s so much easier to decipher who wrote what with user photos.

Looky what I found in MY mailbox..  $300 from the world’s biggest crud, mark francis.  Whoopie dingdong. hahaha

Update: I used some of the gift card to buy the Ed Hardy temptation watch for Me and the Ed Hardy shoes for MY GF. There’s lot more stuff to buy off MY amazon wishlist. Get to shopping, freakboys!!

Who are you kidding, mark?  We all know you have a big crush on MY new slave mcdreamy mcqueeny.  If he ever pisses Me off, I’ll make him do phonesex with you..but so far he hasn’t done anything to deserve that severe punishment.  Sure he’s a handsome hunk of shit which is a hair better than being a ugly hunk of shit like you.  Truth be told, all men are shit, good looking or bad and you ALL deserve to be tortured, used and abused.  Got any more cash, mark?  If so, SEND IT!  If not, piss off. hahahahahahhahahahaha!

The pic of MY amazon power legs are driving all you farts batty.  Pay the World’s Most Lethal Legs, losers!