I spent the entire weekend SHOPPING!
grandpa freakpie spent over $2,000.00 for MY new solid wood entertainment center for MY den and bedroom night stand for MY master bedroom.
At first I was determined NOT to get another wall unit but after looking at some consoles I decided I would not have enough room underneath for MY tivo, stereo, speakers, vcr, dvd player, karaoke machine and digital cable box and dvd’s..sooo ..I got a smaller wall unit. The other one I had was a whopping 80 inches wide.this one is only 53. Woohoo!
I also went and bought My massage chair with the gc’s he sent and it should be delivered shortly. Then I bought a new coffee table, an end table and this totally cool large decorative table (a credenza) for My living room. I have SOOO much redecorating and renovations to do.

My self-propelled, key-start lawn mower showed up today too. It’s quite the machine. hahaha Do you know I’ve never started a lawn mower in My life?? I wonder who the lucky freak who will be to use it first?

Saturday night we went to an outdoor party and the friggin mosquitos ate ME alive!! WTF?? None of MY friends got bitten but I was smothered with bites. I wonder if it was MY perfume or something. Then the next night we went to Barb’s cook-out and I slathered on the bug spray and STILL got bitten. Everybody and everything is so friggin’ attracted to ME! But anyway.. Fun Fun Fun weekend!

Still waiting on that leather dress so I can do photos. Blame it on the guy who got the dress that you haven’t got any new photos to worship.

Back to the gym tomorrow and spinning classes start again thursday.

Hey freakos! I have a BUSY busy weekend in store for Me, so I won’t be online much until monday evening. fatmac sent Me $300 and veronica $250. I made fagarina drive to BestBuy with his pants and undies in the back seat and buy ME $1,000 of Bestbuy GC’s. Get them in the mail and fedex them to Me, fagafreaka! I am still trying to figure out just how I want to spend My $3,800 promised by grandpa freakpie. he begged to buy Me furniture for MY house instead of just making a $3,800 donation. So far he’s been very good for an old fart, and I do need some new furniture. Right now I’m looking for the perfect television cabinet/stand. I’m pitching MY gigantic wall unit. I’m also still looking for the perfect coffee table.

$500 donation from terrance. I see $100 donation from a jason. Annoying boston slut sent Me a piddly $75, $200 gift certificates at some stupid store I’ll never use and $25 GC at some bookstore. The GC’s I think he got for his birthday or something. ali mcloser also sent $100 and WTF??? ali, you fucktard I said $500 MORE!!

Update: Nutjob..that’s not a poem I wrote.it’s the lyric of an old song.

SEPARATED AT BIRTH!
Grandpa Freakpie and E.T.

Grandpa Freakpie’s $1600 PLUS ALL his pertinent personal info. he included photo copies of his driver’s license, medical cards, ALL his credit cards, passwords to his banking accounts, email accounts, and extremely detailed financial budget.

hahah I so fucked the baboon outta another $400. he also bought Stevie a few items off Her wishlist.

Oh yeah! grandpa pornpie’s $1600 cash showed up by fedex! he says I have another $3,800 to shop with. I just have to decide what I want to spend it on! 🙂 I’ll post a photo of the fedex when I get home tonight.

sissy tommikins just sent $200 and bought MY trainer’s new Nike Shox and a new australian guy who sounds a bit “off” sent ME $150 AU.which I think comes out to be a bit over $100. (whoopie dingdong). Anyway, this guy says his mama gives him $100 a month to pay to see his shrink, which I think would be extra fun to take from him and make him skip his therapy. Well.I’m going to make it a pet project to get this guy institutionalized so I can brag about it in MY diary. Princess sends student to the loony bin! Sounds fun, huh? We will see how that goes. If he works out his new slave name will be nut job.

They’re coming to take you away, HA HA
They’re coming to take you away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the funny farm
Where life is beautiful all the time
And you’ll be happy to see
Those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And they’re coming to take you away, Ha-haaa!

I thought it was a joke
And so I laughed
I laughed when you had said
That losing me would make you flip your lid
Right. . .

You know I laughed, you heard ME laugh
I laughed, I laughed and laughed
And then I left
But now I know you’re utterly mad!
And. . .

They’re coming to take you away, HA HA
They’re coming to take you away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the happy home
With trees and flowers and chirping birds
And basket weavers who sit and smile
And twiddle their thumbs and toes
And they’re coming to take you away, Ha-haaa!

I took your cash
I spent it all.
And this is how I pay you back
For all your kind, unselfish loving deeds?!!
HAh!. . .

They’re coming to take you away, HA HA
They’re coming to take you away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the funny farm
Where life is beautiful all the time
And you’ll be happy to see
Those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And they’re coming to take yiu away, Ha-haaa!

Update: The $300 didn’t come from a female. It was a dude using a woman’s card.

Wow.grandpa freakpie really is old. he never stops talking about old people stuff. I started snoring in his ear. he actually told ME what a great seamstress his mother was last night..and actually thought I cared. OMG I don’t know if I have the patience to financially milk Mister Magoo. he only has a $25,000 life insurancy policy. BUMMER! he doesn’t work and doesn’t make a lot of money. I thinking I’m going to make him be a walmart greeter. hehehe Besides Walmart and Micky D’s does anyplace actually hire 80 year old people??

Just got $300 with a female’s name in the billing? Is this a Woman who sent this tribute or one of you dweebs using your wife’s card? Let Me know. I’m curious.

Where the fuck is that leather dress??? Grr.I need to write the company and see what’s the hold up. grr

Here’s a little assignment for one of you hair addicts. I want a back up hair dryer. I can’t find the one I have and love anywhere online, so someone is going to have to go to Sally’s beauty and get it for Me and ship it. I think it runs somewhere around $100 but I’m not completely positive.
Get MY hairdryer

update: $300 from jimmy jizm hand.

Hey everybody! I just got done talking to My newest slave raymond on the phone. he sounds like 100 years old but says he’s just 80. This old fart just bought Me $2,500 gift cards from Brookstone for My massage chair. he liked when I called him freakpie.but since he’s like OLD.I’m gonna call him grandpa freakpie. hahaha, really..his voice is soo totally amusing.it is all warbly. he says he has been reading MY page for the last 17 hours. hahaha So anyway, grandpa freakpie is the newest member of the minion family. he promises to fedex ME $1,600 in a few days too. I’m so happy to get this Imedic chair and not the cheaper I-joy one I had on MY wishlist. This expensive one totally feels like someone is massaging your neck..that I-joy one I was thinking about doesn’t really do the neck that well.

turdeater bought a few things today too off MY amazon wishlist. A lawn mower, coffee maker, and a Logitech universal remote.

I just took advantage of fagarina! Made him buy ME a smaller flat screen tv (26″) for My gym, another Sonicare toothbrush and a dvd player for the gym too. hahaha SUCKER! Oh and screwy louey also got that other Goddess of Flowers framed art I wanted. 🙂 Have a drink to celebrate, louey! Then come back and shop some more.

Going on vacation the second week of November. All Lesbian Vacation. Not a man in sight for 7 days and nights. Aaaaaaahhhh..pure friggin bliss! Wish it was 2 weeks instead of just one though. We are planning another big tropical vacation sometime in april or may. Many spending opportunities abound for you freaks in the future.

SHOP MY AMAZON WISHLIST

Congrats to My friend Michelle who got our $100 back from tow truck Charlie. She put so much pressure on him that he cracked like a boiled egg!.. A big fat furry boiled egg with a ZZtop beard and bad breath.