Monthly Archives: March 2008

Little somethin somethin

Little somethin somethin

oliver peters smith from Duizburg Germany just sent ME $800!  We totally laughed our asses off at him!   jewish piggy sent $400 last night.  I still hate your fucking ass you fucking Gefilte freak!  $100 from mrobot.  $175 from some new cocksucker caller.  randy mersch the humpbacked freaky pot-head called and was separated from his $300.  randy, your pot problem isn’t serious enough, it’s totally time for you to take up snorting coke!  We both know you want Me to turn you into a cocaine addict.  vintage furfreak bought Me this cool multi-colored polka-dotted cheesecake dress for photos.   Oh and let’s not forget the $300 tribute that the twitterpated and completely mind-fucked hairlip sent My way.  To get all Jerry Mcquire on you, hairlip.  “I complete you.” awwww..touching, huh?  Umm I’ll be around for calls tonight (sunday) but we have a few projects we will be working on.  Tomorrow MY girlfriend has the day off and we are going to go shopping and get our teeth zoomed! Yay!! 

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Springtime!

Spring time is here and i am finally getting started on my weight-loss program.  DDR is having me email my weight at the beginning of each week (as well as periodic pics to show the progress of my fingernails now that she has me buffing them and oiling them regulary) with any subsequent punishments to be determined by Princess Sierra.  Up to now, even though I would never dream of running around shirtless ever again, I could at least feel comfortable in loose t-shirts on top of super-tight under armour to hold in my bouncy boobs and often erect nipples.  I’ve tried to distract from my feminine eyebrows (and perhaps look smarter) by always wearing glasses, and always having a little 5 o’clock shadow on my face.  By being a larger sized guy with buzzed thinning hair and all the above, I’ve felt at least partially comfortable that I could still keep my sissification somewhat secret in my regular public life.

But today, Princess made me call for an appointment to finally start getting the laser hair-removal done on my faced as well!  It has always been my dream that someday I could be like a wise old-man with a gray beard, and who knows”-maybe even find another woman to spend my final days with?  But there will be no female flavor to savor for the rest of my life . . . bye bye mustache forEVER!!!  And even though I’ve been keeping my arms epilated all winter when I could wear long sleeves, I had been hoping to stop before short-sleeve season begins, but Princess said, “NO!”  I have to epilate legs, arms, and underarms year-round!  It keeps the hair away for a few weeks at a time, but eventually there will be some stubble for a few days before it gets long enough to re-epilate and now I won’t be able to hide it!  Add to that the fact that I can no longer wear male pants and that Princess said my next pair of glasses have to be with female frames, I don’t know how I am going to be able to have an ounce of confidence left to look anyone in the eye and carry on a conversation at all like I have always done.

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Peep Show

Peep Show

western union man: you better call ME PRONTO! your wife called Me yesterday.

Heeheehee Check out how fagarina spent his Easter! he got to call Me last night and hear Me and MY girlfriend play poker, drink cocktails and make fun of him after our Easter DinDin. he was totally pussified. he put 2 crispy $100 bills in the mail, one for Me and one for Her. So I made him paint his peepee yellow and glue googly eyes to it and make it an easter peep. Well I instructed him to first decorate his penis as an easter egg and then have it spontaneously “hatch” on cam and out would pop his yellow “peep” penis in which he would tenderly place on a plate full of other marshmellow filled “peeps”. The hatching wasn’t near as magical as I imagined but still, it was silly enough to make us giggle. Yes, fagarina rarely fails to amuse. Too bad I can’t say the same for the rest of you.

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Pretty please… I’m PRETTY…so you PLEASE ME!

Pretty please...  I'm PRETTY...so you PLEASE ME!

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The first picture shows the color I painted the guest room.  I stuck a different light bulb in and it’s no longer minty. Yay! The second picture features MY ever mischievous smile. hmm looks like it’s time to cut MY 2 little forehead curls they are getting super long again.

Ok Ive been all super busy with house stuff and running errands and watching 3 seasons of The Office,  so here’s a recap of the things I got the last day or two.  hairlip got the priority art and 2 pillows I wanted, amsterdam ham sent $500, $300 from lucky O’ fucker,  $250 from gunner, $200 for the portuguese slave and a cool duvet cover set from MY amazon and 2 matching pillows.

grandpa when is that $570 coming in the mail??  you fucking fossil! I am so going to make you suffer!  you are so fucking stupid, I want to rip your nutsack off, deep fry it and feed it to you!  mrobot is out of cash so I’m making him sell his guitar and amp.  Hey tittyboy! Did your chastity device for your piercing get there yet?  And louZer, I don’t think you’ve taken Me shopping or made a donation for at least two weeks!  Get your hairy fairy ass to MY donation page and make yourself useful!

We are staying in tonight and watching flicks.  I will probably take phone calls if you send a big enough offering before hand. Tata for now!

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Long weekend!

Long weekend!

Update:  PRIORITY SHOPPING ITEMS  Get both of them, they are from the same store. 

2 of these pillows 

This wall art 34×34 Received!

Fucking A! I had a busy weekend. On Saturday we went on a St. Patty’s all-day Pub Crawl. It started at 11 a.m.!  We had a blast! Oh yay! My dresser and night stand for the guest room arrived.  I had the carpet in there shampoo’ed and repainted the bedroom a light green.  I still havent decided if I like the paint yet.  It was a  bit more minty then it looked in Lowe’s..I was hoping for more of a sage color.  I’ll have to look at it a little longer.  ANYway!  I got a new mailbox.  From now on ship all BIG items..furniture, heavy art work, lamps ect to this address: 

Sierra Horizons   1933 E. Dublin Granville Rd #104, Columbus OH 43229.  The Winchester Blvd address is still open but I’m going to start using the other one for the time being and see which one I like the best.  Scribble it down in your address books, cellphone books and wallets because I have a LOT of shopping for you old farts to do!  Ok I’m running late. Take note of the new shipping address, I have to go to get ready for spinning class.

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Yawn… heading to bed.

Yawn... heading to bed.

Today I got $600 from oliver who is so totally smitten.   Yes oliver, I want to take EVERYTHING from you..and not just your money.soo SOO much more!  simon sent $500.  Hahaha! I love it simon! But I think you owe ME another $500 for being a fucking dunce!  you canceled your weekly lovetax after your last bout with guilt, you fucking buttinski!  Take out that credit card and repent of your sins, bitchboy! 

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fagarina you better be getting your easter outfit ready, it’s coming up! tittyboy got his new piercing for his chastity device! FUNNY!  Woohoo! Let’s lock it up and throw away the key!

K I’ve been running around most of the day and I’m exhausted. Heading to bed early tonight.  Buhbye, suckahs!

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Frenum Piercing for Chastity

i went tonight to get a frenum piercing for a new chastity device that is on order. The girl who was going to do it was built like one of those Hindu goddesses–she was very tall with small waist in proportion to her oversized hips and breasts. So i was really nervous about her poking a hole in my shrivelled up penis. A girl like her would have thought i was gay for sure. But they didn’t have the right hardware at that store for an 8 guage piercing, which is what was reccommended by Ms. Lori who sold me this device: http://www.chastitytube.com/CV1506.jpg It has not arrived yet, but i will need some time for my new piercing to heal up before i can wear it fulltime. Anyway, i’ll be going back tomorrow around noon because they had the right hardware at another nearby shop, and then it will either be the same girl or another guy who wasn’t there tonight who will be doing the piercing. i don’t think it will be too painful, but i’m sure it will be uncomfortable for a while. i’ve seen piercings done before so i know it wont take long, but this will be my very first one anywhere. So i’ll post a follow up tomorrow.

Also, DDR sent me out to a local Sally’s Beauty Supply store to get some items to buff and strengthen my fingernails so they will look more feminine and grow without breaking so easily. So i’ll be treating them on a regular basis from now on.

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